JELLY BELLY

This caricature of me was drawn by RICK THOMAS. It's my birthday today!!! I think Rick got my likeness real good on this one, with one exception; THE JELLY BELLY. I got 2 bags of Jelly Belly jelly beans, all kinds of flavors! So Rick drew my body as the shape of a jelly belly, even my head shape is drawn as a jelly bean shape, complete with glossy shine. Come to think of it, my head is that shape, and my forehead is that shiny...and my body is kinda like that too. Oh no. Is this how far I have let myself go?! It can't be...it is!! No no no. It's enough to give me a complex about my body.

BIRTHDAY ROASTING

The top drawing is from LISE. She bought me a huge bag of JELLY BELLY jelly beans! Thus the goldfish with the bag of jelly beans. Oh, and the reason for the goldfish is because that is the production we are currently working on. ALAINE's drawing is hillarious. I just got the joke now. The jelly belly reference is obvious. But why the French beret on my head and the French bread under my arm? ...because I was born in Toulouse France!!! Those are my big round human fly sun glasses. The birthday wish from CARLOS is self explanatory. I don't know who drew the fish with bomb on his head. My guess is, it is a reference to the recent uproar about that cartoonist that drew Muhammed with a bomb on his head. But I do not worship goldfish.

ERROL'S BIRTHDAY ROAST TO ME

Here's ERROL's birthday greeting. I used to have an iguana. I tell stories of my iguana and me all the time. Again, I am drawn with my big round sun glasses. You have to see them to believe them. "...pencil twirler of questionable degree."??!! I guess pencil twirling is better than blankly starring off into space for minutes on end, which I apparently do all the time.

MORE BIRTHDAY ROASTING

These are all inside jokes from the studio, SARDINE; my huge human fly sun glasses, Carlos suddenly screaming "Canadian Tire!" like a person with Tourette's syndrome, and Chu's goldfish croatian sushi.

I SAVED THE GROSSEST FOR LAST

Okay. This one requires some explaining. I have a cat named RAZOR. He is 5 years old. Just this summer he started pooing on my bed and on the futon. He still pees in the litter box, just refuses to poo in it. He might be asserting his dominance over my other cat, also a male. I have tried everything to stop Razor from doing this. I screamed at him, I rubbed his nose in his mess, I hit him, I hugged and comforted him, I showed him extra affection. Nothing has worked. I have one more trick up my sleeve. If it doesn't work, I am left with only one option. I do not want to give him to the humane society, it would be very cruel for him to be caged up in a small cage, he would be suffering and very miserable. I can't give him away, because I won't know if whoever takes him won't give him to the humane society if he has the same problem. So I half jokingly said I would have to take him out into the woods, with an axe and put him down myself. I wouldn't get a vet to inject him, because it would be something I need to do myself. Like in my grandparents day, when a farm animal is ill, you take it out back behind the barn and kill it yourself. I dont think it will have to come to that. My new trick to get him to use the litterbox again will work. I hope. Anyway in GUY's drawing there is a decapitated RAZOR pooing on my bed. 'Nuff said.